Stupid Spoiled Criminal

It pains me whenever I choose to write about Paris Hilton, since that no-talent alcoholic whore does not deserve a single ounce of the ink she gets. But today, it is absolute glee that I announce that Paris Hilton will be spending 45 days behind bars. After being put on probation for driving under the influence and having her license suspended, Hilton was stupid enough not only to keep driving, but to drive 70 mph in a 35 mph zone, without headlines. Then, she was shocked and appalled that the prosecution had the nerve to ask that she actually be incarcerated for violating her probation.

I'm not going to make some statement about how she hopefully finally realizes she's not above the law, nor am I going to say that received what she had coming to her. I'm also not going to proclaim that for once, a celebrity is not able to buy his or her way out of trouble. Instead, my reaction is pure schadenfreude. Paris Hilton has never worked a day in her life, relying instead upon her tolerance for alcohol and willingness to spread her legs for anything that moves to pull in movie roles, recording deals, and gigs where's she's paid thousands of dollars to show up and get wasted. In the words of the immortal Nelson Muntz, "ha-ha!" I wonder if Fox might be interested in throwing Nicole Ritchie in the cell with her and calling it The Simple Life 6: The Big House. I'd watch.