You're Fired!

Sunday night saw the premiere of the new installment of NBC's The Apprentice. While in large part it's the same old show, Donald Trump and company have made several changes, which may or may not for the better, but certainly serve to mix things up. The largest change is the venue. After six seasons on the Urban Survivor island of Manhattan, The Donald has moved his operation to Los Angeles, constructing a boardroom in some rent-a-mansion in the Hollywood Hills.


Perhaps the next most notable change comes from Trump's apparent desire to screw with the candidates. While the winning team each week gets to live in the rent-a-mansion (albeit in a communal bedroom), with a swimming pool perfect for weekly cheesecake shots, the losers are forced to live outdoors in tents and use outhouses and beach-type showers. Additionally, winning project managers get to remain in the position until they lose, as well as assist Trump in the boardroom when he fires someone from the losing team. All these bonuses serve to enhance the winning's teams chances to succeed by putting the losers at a triple handicap. We'll see if the combination of inferior sleeping arrangements and rules that keep successful candidates in positions of power serve to prevent underdog teams from ever turning the tables.

But the more things change, the more they stay the same. The Donald is as smarmy as ever and is just as willing to harp on some insignificant statement made in the boardroom and blow it way out of proportion. The show has more than its share of nauseating camera shots of The Donald with his trophy wife and newborn baby. He has also continued to use his daughter Ivanka (you know, the one he said he'd have sex with, if she weren't his daughter) as a boardroom assistant, especially since she makes for a continuing slap in the face at Martha Stewart, whose own daughter was a strong, silent type, who didn't exactly make for compelling television in the forgettable Apprentice spinoff.

Another holdover from prior seasons is the casting of a contestant in the Omarosa-Stacie J.-Danny-Brent Memorial Outcast/Clown Role. This time around, the spot was filled by sartorially-challenged Deval Patrick lookalike (and soundalike) Martin. While in past seasons, Trump has let the clown stick around for two weeks, this time around, Trump actually chose a qualified candidate over good television, delivering those famous two words that remain the same whether you're on the left coast or the right -- you're fired.