Playing The Spread 2K7, Week 11

Roger Goodell is in his second season of his iron-handed rule as NFL commissioner. In his brief tenure, Goodell has cracked down on just about everything from off-field criminal activity to drinking during team functions to illicit videotaping of defensive signals to on-field touchdown celebrations.

It's the latest crackdown with which I take issue. Previously, I thought that the likes of Terrell Owens and Chad Johnson were egotistical showboaters whose limelight-seeking behavior was deplorable. Goodell felt the same way, banning all celebrations that involve the players leaving their feet or using a prop. Players have complained for years about the NFL squeezing all the individual expression out of the game, labeling the NFL as the "No Fun League." Under the current policy, even the Lambeau Leap is technically verboten (even if not enforced). Owens was fined for holding the football against the goalpost and pretending to film a movie with it, even though the football and goalpost were on-field implements, not extraneous props.

It's a dangerous slippery slope and I think Goodell has gone too far. Unless the dance is in bad taste (i.e. throat-slashing gestures or Randy Moss' fake moon of the Lambeau Field fans) Goodell should just leave it alone. After all, the successful teams are the ones who don't engage in individualistic showboating. By cracking down on otherwise inoffensive touchdown celebrations, Goodell is needlessly reducing the entertainment value of his product.

The following picks are for entertainment purposes only and should not the basis for any actual cash wagers.

Last Week: 3-10-1
Season To Date: 68-67-9
Best Bets: 5-5
Eliminator: 8-2 (Streak: W 2)
The Monkey: 5-4-1

Chargers (+3) over Jaguars
Peyton Manning's favorite receiver last week? Antonio Cromartie. LOSS

Browns (-3) over Ravens
Rarely have I seen a team with such a complete lack of desire to win. Even though they kept the Bengals out of the end zone the entire game, the Ravens still lost 21-7. TIE

Giants (-3) over Lions
While they may be on pace for a wild card spot, every once in while they remind all of us that they're still the Lions. WIN

Saints (+1.5) over Texans
Matt Schaub and Andre Johnson are expected to be back on the field for Houston this weekend. It's kind of like Carl Pavano coming off the DL -- sure, it's great that they're healthy, but will it really make much of a difference? LOSS

Packers (-9.5) over Panthers
Immediately after this week's showdown between Brett Favre and Vinny Testaverde, the loser will be carted away to the Golden Pasture Retirement Home. WIN

Chiefs (+14.5) over Colts
Now that the Colts have lost two straight games, Peyton Manning jokes are fair game once again. Let's try this one: How many Colts does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two -- one to hold it and Peyton Manning to sit there muttering about how he's doing it wrong, even though Manning gave him a bad bulb to begin with. WIN

Vikings (-5) over Raiders
All-World rookie Adrian Peterson will miss at least one game (and perhaps many more) with a torn LCL. Sounds like a good reason to dock his paycheck. WIN

Eagles (-10) over Dolphins
You know your franchise is in trouble when your last chance to resurrect your season lies in the hands of a recently-reinstated free-spirited unabashed marijuana addict who hasn't played a single down in two year. TIE

Bucs (-3) over Falcons
Michael Vick's sentencing on dogfighting charges is a month away. However, he got some good news today when he learned that once incarcerated, he'll be able to share a cell with Barry Bonds. WIN

Bengals (-3) over Cardinals
Every so often, the Cardinals play a really great game. Unfortunately for them, playoff berths aren't awarded by calculating the number of wins over a three-year span. LOSS

Steelers (-9.5) over Jets
With Michael Vick on ice until further notice, Ben Roethlisberger of all people is making his case for being being the NFL's new dynamic scrambling quarterback. LOSS

Cowboys (-10.5) over Redskins
After last weekend's decisive victory over the Giants, the Cowboys are the definitive team to beat in the NFC. I would have loved to a fly on the wall in Drew Bledsoe's Montana ranch, watching the retired quarterback wince every time Tony Romo completed yet another difficult pass. LOSS

Rams (-3) over 49ers
These two teams have a combined 3-15 record, but at least St. Louis is on a winning streak. WIN

Seahawks (-5.5) over Bears
Rex Grossman's off-the-bench performance in Chicago's comeback last week has caused Bears fans to forgive his ineffectiveness during the rest of this season. I know better. WIN

Bills (+16) over Patriots
By moving this game into the prime-time slot, the NFL gave the Bills a seven-hour stay of execution before their ritual slaughter. LOSS

Titans (+2) over Broncos
I'm 2-7 picking Broncos games this year, which tells me that this time around, I should go against every instinct I have. But somehow, I just can see this wildly inconsistent team pulling off two decisive wins in a row. LOSS

BEST BET: Rams (-3) over 49ers WIN
ELIMINATOR: Philadephia Eagles WIN

THE MONKEY: Dolphins (+10) over Eagles TIE